Thursday, June 21, 2012

Things I'd like to Know....(before the world ends)


So I have to admit, I kind of think the whole Mayan prediction of the end of the world is freaking fascinating.  I won't go into my (lack of) theological beliefs right now, and I'm in no way hoping that the world actually does end next December, but since we may possibly only have another 6 months  here on Earth, I have some questions that I'd really like to know the answers to before that fateful day arrives.  Here are a few:

1.  How can you love your child so much that it hurts and still crave nothing other than spending time away from them? 

2.  How come the people working at the customer service desks always have to call for a manager to give them a code & then spend forever waiting to proceed?  Really?  I am the first person who required that specific code?  And why don't the customer service people just watch what the managers do and then steal their little code & make it all go faster?

3.  How come the nights when you can't/ shouldn't get drunk are the ones that it inevitably happens-- and the one night of the year when you have a babysitter or don't have to work the next day all you can do is nurse your glass of wine/ beer and dream about going home to bed?

4.  Why do I love the Iowa Hawkeyes even though they appear to be a bunch of thugs?

5.  How can we put a man on the moon (we'll save the conspiracy theory for another blog) but not invent a panty-hose that doesn't run?

6.  Why was the month of June warm and sunny when I was a kid and now it's cold and rainy?

7.  Why do gray hairs have to be all coarse and pubic-like--not just gray?

8. How come Janet Evanovich can't let Stephanie Plum age a little and develop as a character?

9.  How can a person who smokes a pack a day have crystal clear lungs and a marathon runner who has never smoked a cigarette can die from lung cancer?

10. Do the stuffed animals and toys really come alive at night?

11. Why hasn't anyone created a plastic cover that protects open laptops from babies/ toddlers?

12. I seriously do not understand how you can scrape every ounce of dried glue off the top of the orange Elmer's Glue container, literally see through the little hole, and yet it remains plugged.   WTF?

Let me know the answers if you know them!  And I'll post more questions in the future-- just didn't want to overwhelm anyone with my random thoughts.

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